10 Things That Great Dads Do (No.5)

As we continue our series “10 Things That Great Dads Do” we are identifying key character traits that elevate ordinary men into ‘Great Dad’ status. Many of the ‘Great Dads’ I have met share similar characteristics and it is these common areas that I thought worth sharing in this series. Today I am going to write about the fact that all ‘Great Dads’ have the respect of their children.

daddy-girl

Great Dads Have The Respect Of Their Children

respect
noun
  • a feeling of deep admiration for someone or something elicited by their abilities, qualities, or achievements.
We see from the definition of ‘respect’ that it is a feeling that comes as a result of our actions as a man and father. Respect is built up over a period of time through consistently doing the right things in life, especially in areas that apply to our relationships within the family.
Who is the Leader?

Initially it is important to understand what are the foundations of family life. A family unit doesn’t just appear magically out of no where, but is developed through the union/marriage of a man and a woman. Within a marriage there are ‘Roles’ that are clearly defined in scripture, Adam was created first and Eve was given to Adam as a help-mate or partner.

Genesis 2:18  And the Lord God said, “It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.”

Both Adam and Eve were loved and cherished by God and both have incredible value in the sight of God. Man is not better than woman, or woman better than man, both have equal value within God’s sight. Where the difference lies is within the ‘Roles’ that each of them play within the family unit. The Man is called to be the family leader or head and his wife is called to assist him and partner with him in his role.

If a man does not have the respect of his wife it is far more difficult to achieve long-term respect from his children. It is therefore within this relationship with his wife that a man must begin to build the respect required for success. A marriage that is filled with love and mutual respect is a strong foundation for family life, and will benefit our children immensely. Alternately, if we lack these elements within our marriage, our family life will suffer and may even struggle to survive as a family unit.

Children Need To Respect Their Parents

Exodus 20:12  “Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long upon the land which the Lord your God is giving you.”
We see here that one of the ‘Ten Commandments’ that God gave to His people directly identified respecting and honouring parents as a crucial part of family life and a way to maintain the blessing of God over your life. What follows is a short list of areas that influence our ability to achieve and maintain the respect of our family and specifically our children.
How You Build Respect
  • Respect is built through shouldering responsibility. As the father and leader of our home we are the primary provider and protector of our family. It therefore falls to us to lead through carrying much of the responsibility for dealing with the difficult issues that sometimes arise in family life. Don’t shy away from or attempt to delegate the issues that you alone are able to deal with effectively. Great Dads carry the responsibility of fatherhood.
  • Respect is built through keeping your word. As a man we need to be known for doing what we say we will do, and as a father this is even more important. It is crucial to think clearly before we make commitments that we may not be able to perform. Don’t make promises to your children unless you fully intend to keep them. If for any valid reason you are not able to fulfil your promise apologise and explain to your children the reasons why, but be aware that if you make excuses often your credibility will suffer accordingly. Great Dads are men of their word.
  • Respect is built by going the extra mile. Don’t just do the bare minimum required to lead your family, but always be on the lookout for opportunities to express your love through acts of kindness and generosity. Great Dads do more for their families.
  • Respect is built by being a kind and supportive leader. As the head of the home we are called to be the shining example of fatherly care and support for our wife and children. If they are struggling with issues in life stand with them and encourage them through it. Great Dads are known for being kind.
  • Respect is built by listening when your children need to talk. If your children know that they can go to you for advice and guidance without being ‘belittled’ or ‘dismissed as trivial’ it will go a long way toward cementing a deep respect within them for you and your role as their father. Great Dads develop the ability to listen.
  • Respect is built by being humble. If we as the father are not teachable and willing to change when our own faults become apparent then our children may well struggle to respect us. Our own inadequacies are never more visible than within a family environment, where our conduct is on show 24/7. By admitting your own failures and asking for forgiveness when we need to, a father shows the way for his children to follow. This action of humility helps enable our children to accept and deal with their own shortcomings more easily. Great Dads understand the importance of humility.
  • Respect is built by giving respect and praise that is due. Respect is a two-way street we must give it to receive it. We must respect our wife as a co-equal within our home and honour her often in front of the children, appreciating her hard work and many personal sacrifices for the family. In the same way we need to understand and respect the fact that our children are unique and important individuals that God has entrusted into our care. As we appreciate them and encourage them in life we make it easy for them to reciprocate by showing us respect as their father. Great Dads show respect to others first.

Respect Should Be Required But Can Not Be Demanded

Because ‘respect’ is a feeling that comes from the heart it is something that must be real and heart-felt. If respect is to be heart-felt it must come willingly and not merely because it is demanded by an overbearing father.

In the first instance it is a father’s responsibility to make sure that their children know that God requires them to respect their parents. Then the challenge we face as fathers is to be the kind of father that is worthy to be respected. The way a man treats his wife and his children will either make it very easy for them to show him respect or very difficult.

‘Great Dads’ have the respect of their children because they consistently exhibit character traits that are worthy to be admired, they lead the way by their life example and create a path for their children to follow.

Warm Regards

John

Dadsuni

http://www.dadsuni.com

You may also find this teaching beneficial:

http://dadsuni.com/teach-your-children-to-show-respect-for-authority.html

5 Benefits Of Traditional Marriage

What is Marriage really? I have heard it said on numerous occasions by the younger generation “it’s just a piece of paper”, and therefore by extension ‘not worth doing’. With so many people these days seeming to ‘opt out’ of the institution of traditional marriage, I thought it may be beneficial to explore some reasons why it may be advantageous for them to reconsider their stance on marriage. ” But what are the real benefits of marriage as opposed to other lifestyle choices? What follows are 5 simple but powerful reasons that sets traditional marriage apart.

wedding-rings

 

Marriage Instituted By God

Genesis 2:23-24

And Adam said:

“This is now bone of my bones
And flesh of my flesh;
She shall be called Woman,
Because she was taken out of Man.”

 Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.

As soon as God created Eve from one of Adams ribs He ordained that their union should be permanent, this was a natural reflection of a spiritual truth. Through the physical consummation of marriage Adam and Eve’s union was already permanent spiritually speaking. Through ‘marriage’ God set in place a principle that laid a foundation for life on earth, a principle that would enable mankind to increase and prosper. Marriage between a man and a woman is the only physical relationship that has God’s seal of approval.

Marriage Is A Vow Before God

Ecclesiastes 5:4

When you make a vow to God, do not delay to pay it;
For He has no pleasure in fools.
Pay what you have vowed—

Everything we do in life is done in the sight of God. Marriage is first and foremost a vow that we make as a man in the sight of our creator and by choosing marriage we are following the principle that God set in motion. We also recognise and accept that as a father and the head of our home, we will have to give an account to God about how we conducted ourself in our marriage. As the leader of the home we are expected to rule wisely and with compassion and mercy, showing God’s love to our wife and family. It is from God our heavenly Father that we must glean the wisdom and grace to become the best husband we can be, therefore it is vital that we continue to grow in our personal relationship with Him daily.

Marriage Is A Vow Between A Husband And Wife

Malachi 2:16

“For the Lord God of Israel says
That He hates divorce,
For it covers one’s garment with violence,”
Says the Lord of hosts.
“Therefore take heed to your spirit,
That you do not deal treacherously.”

As we stand before the minister performing the marriage ceremony as a couple we are declaring a solemn vow to love and care for each other for the rest of our lives. This vow entails laying down our own selfish desires to ensure that our spouse is put first in every aspect of life. When both Husband and Wife commit to this life of selflessness they give their marriage every opportunity to prosper and grow throughout their lifetime together.

Marriage Is The Foundation Of Family

Genesis 1:27-28

So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them. 28 Then God blessed them, and God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply; fill the earth and subdue it

Marriage is God’s way of establishing a sure foundation for ‘family’ to grow and prosper in the earth. A married couple who love and are fully committed to each other are the perfect environment for bringing up children. Within the safe confines of ‘marriage’ children grow up feeling secure and loved, knowing that ‘Daddy and Mommy love each other too!’

Family Is The Foundation Of Society

Psalm 103:17-18

But the mercy of the Lord is from everlasting to everlasting
On those who fear Him,
And His righteousness to children’s children,
 To such as keep His covenant,
And to those who remember His commandments to do them.

Even as ‘Marriage’ is the surest foundation for ‘Family’, so ‘Family’ is the surest foundation for ‘Society’. The stronger each individual marriage is, the stronger ‘society’ as a whole is. Every builder knows how important a strong and stable foundation is when they are constructing a house, if the foundation is strong then the house can stand the test of time. So many of the problems we face in ‘society’ today stem from the fact that the family unit has broken down, and that often occurs as a result of a marriage that has broken down.

Traditional marriage as set out by God in the Bible has a blessing and an empowerment from Heaven to be successful and fruitful. It has been instituted by God as a foundation for ‘the family unit’ on earth, a foundation that enables it to prosper. As individual families prosper so our society prospers, and we all reap the benefits of that stability.

Warm Regards

John

Dadsuni

http://www.dadsuni.com

http://dadsuni.com/love-and-be-committed-to-your-wife.html